Words to Him.

 I had a good love affair.

Or so it seemed

He made for smile for years and he warmed my crazy heart

I will and have thrown my pride to the dogs

To have his love

Give anything to claim him as mine

And to be called his.

He was my rock and my joy

My ever strong pillar of sense in my childlike universe,

My resounding voice of reason and source of pain.

My greedy selfish heart wants only his greedy selfish self.

Call me stupid, silly and ridiculous

For constantly wanting to fall into the trap 
That my love for him is.

A love that lies with the dust and dirt of the street

A love that has being repeatedly thrown in my face

Forced down my throat and has only come forth in tears

A love that has made me question me

Question my flaws

And wonder if I will ever be good enough.

It's one in the morning and all I want

Is to lie beside you.

Vague and irrational thinking.

Throwing my phone away is another option

To stop my itching fingers

To hold them still from trying to hear your voice

A voice that used to be filled with love 
Now full of cold words laced with contempt

Laced with an uncaring attitude.

I fucking dare you to tell me what went wrong.

I dare you, you contemptible coward

To face me and tell me why

You would treat me like a beggar.

I dare you to love me properly like you know how to. 

@nkemoyaghire