She had
always been the prettier one and I was the other one. Dowdy looking against the
epitome of elegance that my sister was. Our names were even on a battle. She
was called Esmeralda and I had to deal with the boring name; Faith.
She looked
like a gypsy; her beauty was dark and bold, height that could defy most boys,
hips that called to be stared at, breasts that were made for soft kisses and
caresses. I think she was sent to the world to tell my parents that he was
sorry for giving me to them. She was as kind as an Angel and as beautiful as a
dozen angels.
She was
the younger one and could be irresponsible if she chose to, but since she was
the exact replica of perfect she had to be good. That's why on this fateful day
I don't feel the slightest pain or guilt. She had to go, in life we eliminate
things that prove to make things difficult for us, all because of her my
parents stopped loving me. No boy walked up to me to ask me for my ugly name
all they ever wanted to talk about was the irresistible, surreal, unattainable
Esmeralda, they only settled for me when they felt having sex with me would
make me paint them in a good light before her eyes. Pity became my best friend,
aunts and uncles only remembered her. All the while in my head I keep screaming
“I was here first!!!".
I was the
slut in the family, because I couldn't get love from the people that I wanted
to love me the most. So I looked for it in the trousers of different boys, that
didn't work. Drugs didn't either and alcohol made me angrier. I don't think she
realised what she was doing, she was just living her life as the princess of
the world. Now I would have you know I'm not ugly, it's just like placing a china
doll against a Rag doll. Her beauty overshadowed mine. She was the good, I was
the bad. She was the gift and I was the mistake. I was too busy been ugly both
on the inside and outside for my parents to notice that I was dying inside. But
I knew deep inside me that I was destined for greatness, which I may never
achieve if she was in the way.
I hated
her so much. That doesn't make me a bad person just a normal one. We all hate
our competitions.
As her
coffin was lowered to the ground I felt relief, like a blanket was lifted off
me, I even felt like the sun was smiling on me already. I no longer felt guilty
for pushing her down those steps; I felt joy from knowing that hindrance in my
life was over. My life could start now and Esmeralda could go and join God in
heaven where she should never have come from in the first place.