The Service Chronicles 34: Ford Explorer

Wednesday dawned with darkness, there was no light and I had to do some things with electricity. This week so far has been a horrid affair of timelessness; like I need more than twenty four hours. We had devotion and gave the people travelling to camp our final words to them. 

The Service Chronicles 33: Pre-Fishing

Tuesday I woke up early had my bath and arranged myself for school, I even polished my shoes. It was all methodical. When it was time I rang the bell and we all went for morning devotion after that Papa had a meeting with the Batch B executives which I am one of, after he dismissed us he retained my partner and I, by the time he was through I had to rush to get ready for school. I had an 8 AM class and I wasn’t even ready for it. 

The Service Chronicles 32: Egusi Soup

This Sunday is the second Sunday in a row that I didn’t go to church, God forgive me. After dilly dallying and having a beautiful long nap I washed my clothes and had my bath had a meeting with Koch and I made him frustrated because I was hungry (it’s good for him)

The Service Chronicles 31: One Day and A Weekend

I am tired of skipping days in my chronicles but this used to be so much fun, but I really don’t know. Maybe I am losing the ginger. I shouldn’t lose ginger that would just be bad. Don’t mind me joor. I am being a little bit silly. 

The Service Chronicles 30: Puppy Faces.

Wednesday came and I woke up early enough to brush my teeth and put on some clothes. Then I woke everybody up, the usual people dragged their feet but I was nursing my anger from the previous night so I just played games while they did their business. I honestly could not be bothered. 

The Service Chronicles 29: Traditional Cooking and Snapchat Filters.

I rose up as Lanky; Jennifer’s boyfriend rang the bell. First of all his real name is Noah, he is called Lanky because of his size and he is the Male Organizing secretary (OS), I am the female OS.  I quickly stood up and looked at my time it was 5:44. I was supposed to have started the fire by five and even be boiling water but no I had overslept. 

The Service Chronicle 28: The Day After

He was tackling me for not inviting him to the hangout; apparently he heard the gist that we overfed people. You may wonder how he found out. Well his girlfriend came for the hangout I even said hello and did the entire hullabaloo you are supposed to do when you see someone you kinda know.

The Service Chronicles 27: One Anniversary and a Send Forth.

Saturday was another day of too much work, I woke up late let’s just say I was too tired. So I dragged myself around as usual and ended up in the kitchen. I just knew something was wrong as I sat down. Found my food and ate a little, offered to help with chopping some things for the salad. It was when I offered to help with the carrots that some light was shed on the odd feeling I felt earlier. My help was refused and I was urged to go get ready for the anniversary program. 

The Service Chronicles 26: One Hangout and An Anniversary

There is no word to describe Thursday. It was a roller coaster of activities. The day didn’t even start like any normal day. I didn’t go for devotion because my eye was still hurting and I couldn’t open it, so I spent more time in bed. Only to be awaken by the voice of Nnamdi yelling my name. He said he wanted my crested vest so I stood up to give it to him. Thursday was the day the Batch A corp members of 2015/2016 set passed out. So everywhere was abuzz with activity. They all stomped out in their Khakis rather late as usual to converge at the NYSC secretariat in GRA llorin. 

The Service Chronicles 25: Mango Missile.

Yesterday; Wednesday was full of activity for me. It started with the normal preparation of breakfast of rice and stew for about forty one people. I even finished on time but laziness did not permit me to leave for CDS. Like he sat me down, that is Laziness and whispered reasons why I should not go, they were not valid but I love him so much like I just had to agree with him, especially as I have been ignoring him for too long.

The Service Chronicles 24: Allawee

Tuesday was a breeze. It started the way all my days here start which is with Devotion and then playing around but as God would have it there was light so I just went back to bed and watched a movie; Interstellar. Five minutes into the movie I had to find someone who would explain the dynamics of space to me, so I kidnapped Churchill and he tried a little but Namnam was so much more helpful. After I had walked around with Churchill for my lesson I sank back again to bed for more lessons. 

The Service Chronicles 23: The Dawn of the Snakes.

Monday was a day of promise. I had gotten a reply from Fat Cat and I had an appointment with his Madam at Ray Power, any time from 11 pm (do I hear a whoop whoop).

I trudged to the church, I had had an almost long night, slept around after 12 and I still wanted to sleep but the call to prayer was by 5:45AM and I had no choice to go to church. After a very educative session at devotion I went back to bed only to be awoken by Nam nam; asking for a cutlass. And because amebo is my biggest hobby I asked him what it was for; it’s a pity I can’t put that in my CV. My amebo skills are one in a million I could be a mighty spy, like the CIA needs to employ me. Anyhow sha, after I asked what the cutlass was for, he mentioned to kill a snake. At first I thought this man was joking only for me to let my amebo lead me by hand outside and see Nnamdi or as Koch calls him Unamdi balancing a snake on the cutlass.

The Service Chronicles 22: G-Wagons.

Sunday I woke up bright and early. Read a little bit and it wasn’t my bible; it was the novel I have been reading. After much speculation I choose to wear a skirt and a cotton top to church. I still had to pick which skirt between two skirts. (the problem with having too many clothes)

The Service Chronicles 21: Ray Power

I have to say that the weekend had a beautiful start. After devotion I just hung around reading and terrorizing the people plucking mangoes. There are like ten mango trees in the compound so we have a steady steady supply of mangos. After mango hunting and eating. I went to the shade of a tank and had a mini argument on the state of the country and I have to say this is the first verbal argument I have had on the deteriorating state of the nation this year. And like all the other arguments that have been going on everywhere in the country and in the country’s diaspora it has not reduced the price of fuel or the queues at the filling stations.

The Service Chronicles 20: Tolerance

Friday I woke up with nerves, I was taking the message for the day and I honestly have to say I was nervous as hell. I rang the bell for devotion and roused everybody from their slumber. Waited for everybody to leave for devotion, this is another one of my plenty duties. As I got to church it was already six am, so I just had to wait till 6:05 before I went up, as I walked up to the pulpit I almost wanted to run back. I was really frightened, how can smallie me be teaching all these people. If you even hear the topic I was going to speak on you will just laugh at me. I was to speak on Tolerance. If you know me you would laugh really hard before you continue reading, when I told Mama Nkem she laughed at me and said “me that needs tolerance the most”.

The Service Chronicles 19: One and a Half Days

Wednesday was CDS and it was nothing spectacular. I arose early and cooked, to my dismay Nimi, the welfare militant (she is really a militant I lie not) had not changed the cooking timetable. Finished on time and left early for CDS with Koch. By the time we got there; which was not ridiculously late considering the distance from the lodge to the Local Government office where we have our CDS meetings and the fuel scarcity that is ravaging the country, the LGI (Local Government Inspector) had marked cards and the punishment was to wait till four in the evening from Wednesday to Friday before we late comers got to sign our cards and do our clearance. Oh well.  

The Service Chronicles 18: Movies!!!

Tuesday was a Tuesday indeed (this has no deep meaning at all. Don’t try to decipher it.) There was light for the better part of the day and I was in front of my laptop for a pretty long time. Watched Hit man Agent 47 very very cool movie, I had had it for a very very long time and because I am skeptical about movies that are not obviously comedy or romance (yes , yes I prefer chick flicks, how is it your concern) I would take forever before watching them. 

The Service Chronicles 17: Ilorin

Well I got back to the beautiful town of Ilorin yesterday. The land with all my boyfriends, my baby boos and the pests that riddle my life. Ilorin my new home, Ilorin my life for a year. I would stop at this point before I start to show myself as a poet. I left Lagos state few minutes to seven and got into Ilorin few minutes to eleven. The journey was not particularly exciting I mostly slept throughout the journey like usual. The guy that sat beside me took my number, if he’s too old he is 19, no biggie there he can be my new son. The old lady that sat behind me was very talkative. Well it didn’t really bother me because my ears were mostly plugged even while I slept. 

The Service Chronicles 16: My Junkies.

The country has gone back in time to a period before electricity hence there was no water Papa Nkem turned on the generator to pump water and since we live on the second floor we had to wait for the water to get to the top before we could fetch and store water. 

Since I had to give my grandmother food and her medication I waited behind and went late to church. Oh by the way my grandmother is much better, she does this thing where she takes out her clothes and rearranges them she hasn’t done that since she my dad brought her from the village. Yesterday she did sure sign that she is much better.

I cooked the only food Nigerians love best; rice and made a salad, proceeded to get dressed for church. After struggling to get into my dress, the zip spoilt. I was immensely mad; I raced back upstairs and changed into another dress. 

The Service Chronicles 15: Big Hair and Ten Matches.

I made my hair. Braids. I pray they last. You see my hair is stubborn and since I have decided to not "disvirgin" it (apply relaxer to it) I will suffer the consequences that come with having natural hair. It is usually fine on its own. 

I took sometime before going to the hairdressers. You see in the middle of the night something biological happened and I was in a lot of pain, so much pain that I actually cried. They were purely abdominal pains. The next morning while I was in the kitchen slicing some fruit (we have those every morning) my father came and prayed for me. Some pretty deep prayers. He had most likely heard me crying at night while he had his night prayers and I am sure he was worried that I had been battling some night terrors. I can’t blame him seeing as I am a perfect child and also a little bit of a daddy’s girl. Don’t be jealous. 

The Service Chronicles 14: Two Days

I am honestly tired of staying at home and I am also loving the holiday. For almost three days I have not seen the staircase to my house. This just affirms my lack of motivation to get off my butt. I have to say although I haven’t left my house I have lost some weight, like I have said or somehow implied I am currently serving some slave time. My very very very funny mother, I think I need to add one more very. Told me to stay a few more days at home, I thought it was for something really sweet and nice, when I asked her she said so that I can help her some more. 

Chai! This is my life my people. But as we all know, we perfect children do not thrive well with disobedience and honestly I don’t think I’m ready to rush into the cramped lifestyle I live at the lodge.