I Hate You

The very thought of you

Revolts me.

To think you were the best thing

Saddens me.

Never again to have you.

Never again to hold you.

Never again to hear you 

Say I love you.

Never again to kiss you.

I hate you for you.

For making me this;

Immune. To love.

To the best kind of weakness.

I hate you deeply.

For owing a room in my head;

For being a tenant in my heart;

For showing me the worst pain.

I deserve to hate you.

More than it’s reasonable.

I hate you immensely.

The love in me is poisoned.

Turned bitter like the river Marah.

Poisoned from the fear of falling.

Free into nothing;

Into the bliss of his arms.

The memories of you

Have shut me out from love,

From the fantasy of fairy tales.

No longer can I believe in such magic

No longer do I possess the faith

To comprehend it.

No longer will I love properly.

Above all

I hate me;

For missing you,

For still hoping,

For holding on still

To our elusive romance.

To the dream that I will find love in you.

I hate me for lying

I hate me for dreaming of us

I hate me for loving you.

Nkem Oyaghire